If something you’re choosing is suddenly stealing your joy, it’s a good sign you need to set better boundaries. I’ve been talking with some friends lately about this topic. One friend in particular was finding herself saying yes, when in the moment she *knew* she wanted to say no. She couldn’t figure out why she wasn’t willing to say no … Read More
Set Boundaries to Build Trust
I’m endlessly fascinated by what it means to set boundaries, both from the intent to self-protect, AND from the intent to build healthier, more honest, and more meaningful relationships. My latest musings bring me to several conclusions, one of which is that we set boundaries to build trust. When someone respects a boundary, it makes them – and us – … Read More
How to Maintain Flexible Boundaries
I often share about why and how you should create and maintain boundaries, and one of the biggest things I have learned over the years is this: Your boundaries don’t need to be brick walls. They can also be screen doors. I know this may seem confusing, so allow me to break it down. I think a lot of people … Read More
How Boundaries Create Positive Relationships
It’s a common misconception that someone may set boundaries in order to remove or exclude others from their life. Quite the contrary! THE reason we set boundaries is to keep someone in our lives in a way that allows for a positive relationship. We do this by expressing how we feel (not always, it may depend how close you are … Read More
What I Love About Confrontation
It’s an unpopular opinion, but I strongly believe that avoiding confrontation does not create more peace in your life. It actually builds resentment, cultivates unhappiness, and *disturbs* your peace. Some mistake an enneagram type 8 (which is me) – the challenger – as people who *enjoy* arguing. I don’t enjoy confrontation for the sake of it. And I certainly do … Read More
Why You Need to Embrace Boundaries
I have been discussing boundaries a lot on Instagram lately, and have been flooded with responses from readers about how they have felt empowered to deepen their relationships as a result. I’ve heard things like: “Because of your boundary modeling, I feel empowered in my own life to do the same.” “I have learned so much from you about boundaries … Read More