In reflecting on the personal development work I’ve been doing for nearly a decade overall, it’s typically hard to see or experience the self-improvements in a bubble.
I don’t mean better eating habits or workout routine.
I mean inner work.
I find it’s often only in relation to others where we realize the benefits or progress of our inner work. Personal development is, after all to improve relationships, yes to yourself first, but also to others, right?
I find, too, that when I can show up better for and in relation to others, I’m able to do so for myself as well. They’re not mutually exclusive.
In fact, lately I’ve been very focused on understanding those close to me better and better – their personalities, tendencies, and intricacies (when possible) so that my personal and professional relationships can feel that much better, happier, and more fulfilling all around.
I’m sure I’m not the best spouse on all fronts (I’m terribly messy, leave crap all around the house, and take forever to get to certain related tasks)…
And I know I can be a better boss and leader to those on Team BB (I struggle as a bottleneck on projects at times, or at providing firm deadlines, or at hitting deadlines given to me)…
But I know that the work I’m doing on myself is effective when I look around at the people closest to me. Those who’ve raised their hands to enter those inner circles – spouse, close friends, team members.. and they are legit some of THE BEST AND KINDEST HUMANS you can ever meet.
So, the work is worth it. Identifying your own weaknesses and working on being better than before, it’s worth it.
I’m still working on all of it, but I’m really proud of the person I’m becoming.
And, I am so thankful to be able to see the people around me as no longer *perplexing* with an assumption that I didn’t deserve them there, but rather as a reflection of who I am in their lives, too. If they’re all so close, how can I be the bitch *strangers on the Internet* think I am? I can’t. I’m not.
Getting older does have some perks, folks. This is one of them.
How has your inner work impacted your relationships? What have you learned from it?